We are all well aware that not everything in life goes to plan, which means you often have to start over again. Yet no matter how much we do it, starting over is often seen as a bad thing.
Usually, a fresh start happens after something has gone wrong e.g. a relationship ends, a friendship breaks down and you’re forced to move and figure things out in a new space again.
At the moment I think we’re all undergoing some kind of change, some of which is due to the pandemic but not all of it. Everyone I know is evolving in some way, whether that’s returning to work or education, moving to a new place or first house, or beginning a new relationship. There’s a shift occurring in everyone’s lives at the moment.
The thing about starting over is that it feels slightly uncomfortable, mainly because it’s brand new. I’ve written about how to embrace an unexpected adventure before here. You feel anxious and a bit uncertain, even though it could also be really exciting.
So, how do you make starting over exciting? Take it as a chance to:
Kondo your life
Find what brings you joy and prioritise it. In my opinion everything happens for a reason, we just don’t always know what the reason is.
Whenever you have to start a new chapter in your life take the chance to determine what brings you joy and get rid of anything that doesn’t. Whether that’s clothes, people, material things, aspects of your career or life if it doesn’t make you happy, get rid of it.
Prioritise the people that matter
You always know who is really there for you when things go wrong. Prioritise spending time with the people that make you feel good, loved and most importantly, like yourself.
Create a vision board
Whether you’re a visual person or not, having a visual collection of everything that you aspire to do or become is really powerful. It helps to focus on the things you want to do and make them feel more achievable. Then have it as your laptop background or screensaver on your phone to remind you of what you’re working towards and what matters to you.
Imagine your ideal day a year from now
Right now you’ll probably be feeling a bit unsettled if you’re inbetween something ending and a new beginning, or you’ll be adjusting to your new start. I’m definitely still adjusting to my move to London (read more here) as I’ve started socialising more and spending less time with my laptop. Of course, this is the healthier choice, but there’s still so much work to do!
Anyhoo, stop thinking about today and imagine your ideal day a year from now. What time do you get up? How does the structure of your day look? What are you doing with your time?
It’s not about who’s with you at that time, it’s about what you want to be doing everyday to be happy. If you can imagine it, you can do it.
Focus on bringing more of your personality into your space and life
Every chapter of your life has a slightly different feel to it and as we’re constantly evolving your style has probably changed a lot since your last fresh start.
It’s really empowering to bring more of your own personality into your environment so that when you look around the space, you feel at home. It’s just a physical way to make you feel more relaxed as you can see yourself in the room.
Write a list of things you’d love to do
This is always a good idea, but now you’ve had this new start, it’s time to make a list of everything you’d love to do or try. Obviously some of this will be on hold due to the pandemic, but even if it’s getting takeaway from a place you’ve heard is great or meeting a local friend in the park – add it to the list!
Then perhaps on a free weekend revisit that list and decide where to go next!
Re-watch your favourite films & TV shows
With any kind of change, it’s nice to have some level of comfort and consistency and for me there’s nothing like re-watching a go-to TV show or film. It’s relaxing, entertaining and allows you to escape from your own surroundings and life into a world you love.
Make a list of books to read
Now we get onto the mother of all lists, the to be read list – am I right? In my opinion there is nothing quite like escaping into a good book. Collate those recommendations and get started, stories can really change your whole mood!
Also remember that when life changes happen to characters in books, most of the time the story end well (after the I’m lost, who am I, what am I doing part). Your changes are only going to lead you to better places too.
Have you had to start over? Do you have any tips for being excited about starting over?
Photography by Fifi Newbury